by Ed Naile

I have four pygmy goats, Moxie, Snyder, Gordon, and Clyde. They are perfect practice for understanding New Hampshire’s traditional Town Meetings.

They live in two adjoined stalls in the winter – 20’ x 10’. That is their little town, Barnville, with a school of sorts within its own boundaries.

They mill about and climb on things like their dog crates. Each has one of their own.

Clyde is new so even though he is a large neutered male pygmy he gets picked on.

Gordon is about as smart and sneaky as a goat can get. He likes to stare in your face like a dermatologist would. He is a neutered male.

Next is Snyder. She has horns and a fluffy, downy coat. She avoids controversy and stays to herself as much as she can in a small town like Barnville.

Moxie is the smallest of our pygmies. Her stubby little legs can’t be more than seven inches long. She is a talker – and a fighter. No other goat wants in on a head-butt competition with Moxie.

When I open the Barnville doors, the tiny town comes to attention – like I am the Moderator or something. And they are pretty well organized into their locations near a feed trough, gate, or dog crate.

But all I have to do is show them a bag of cheese doodles and panic sets in – they behave like midget wild beasts.

They love cheese doodles – Moxie not so much, pretzels are her weakness, but she gets caught up in the frenzy as most of us would.

Gordon head-butts Clyde and Snyder, Snyder climbs on Clyde’s dog crate and bites him on the top of his head if he tries to come out, after Gordon chases him in. And Moxie stands her ground and intimidates anyone coming into her space.

I would have to say that the cheese doodles are almost like a town budget or warrant article brought before a human town meeting.

At town and school meetings you have the same personalities in humans as you do with goats.

You have your typical pygmies, neutered males, and passive aggressive types slamming heads over some free treat.

Next, I plan on installing a microphone in Barnville and check the goats for insatiable egos. If Moxie parks herself in front of that microphone and bleats a blue streak for two hours then I will have proven Town Meetings evolved from more civilized animals.